Every now and then, my travels throughout Las Vegas take me to Martin Luther King Boulevard, or “MLK” as I call him (and only I call him).

MLK Blvd. runs parallel to the I-15 just west of the freeway, and cuts through some of the more interesting neighborhoods in town.

When you think about it, this MLK guy must have done some really bad things when he was alive, because they seem to be posthumously punishing the hell out of him by naming the worst street in every American city after him.

Seriously, why aren’t these streets called “Adolph Hitler Boulevard” instead?

It’s thinly veiled racism I tell you.

If there is one thing I will not tolerate, it’s political incorrectness.

I call for the leaders of Henderson to rename “The District” to “MLK Plaza” at once.

Wait, that would be worse.

This poor guy can’t get any respect besides giving shiftless government workers a day off.

When I am gone, I sure hope they don’t rename that perpetually flooded street behind the Imperial Palace … “VegasRex Boulevard”.

Anyway …

I happened to be over on MLK just recently, and while stopped at a stoplight, and hoping not to catch a bullet in my eye socket, a particular house caught my eye.

Somebody spray painted “goo” all over the thing.

“Goo”? What the hell is goo?

It certainly can’t be the name of a street gang. Who would be afraid of crossing the Las Vegas Goo? What would they do, throw Silly Putty at you?

Maybe it was the name of a tagger? Then again, his handiwork was certainly nothing to be proud of … and again, what kind of low self-esteemed graffiti artist would adopt the nickname “goo”?

As the light turned green, and I was pondering the issue, the driver said “It’s 900 … the house number”.

Well, fuck me. All this time I thought they sold little numbered signs at Home Depot.

Spray painting the house number everywhere in sight is much more efficient.

This guy must be getting one hell of a tax refund check, because he does not want the mailman to miss his house under any circumstances.

Sometimes I really hate this city and the people that inhabit it.