Not necessarily at the same time (unless you’re into that).

Few people in this country go grocery shopping in an area filled with gay bath houses, swingers clubs, transvestite boutiques, and sex shops … but that’s exactly where I buy my food.

Of course, I do make sure that the seal on the packaging is not broken on my items. I’ve heard that warm apple pie feels like …. never mind.

Anyway …

The Commercial Center (or “Commerce Center” as it is sometimes known) is located about a half mile east of the Sahara Hotel and Casino, between Sahara Ave and Karen Ave … not far from the Hilton or Stratosphere.

It’s behind the Guitar Center, next to the Las Vegas Country Club, and is a short walk from Sunrise Hospital.

I wouldn’t walk there at night if I were a tourist from Kansas, but like I said, it is a short walk from Sunrise Hospital … where the motto is “If we don’t patch your bullet wound in 30 minutes or less, your next one is free!”

All things considered, it’s really not that risky.

During the day, the place looks like any other strip mall … grocery stores, a tailor, and various other restaurants, boutiques, and markets. It is nondescript, and few if any tourists even know it exists.

A friend of mine recently had his pants altered at the men’s shop here, and I thought the tailor took a little longer than necessary to measure his inseam, but that’s another story.

This place is so hidden away, that even if you drive past it, you don’t know it’s there. Most of the “mall” is actually facing the inside parking lot, and the backs of the buildings face Sahara Ave. It’s the only strip mall I have seen that doesn’t face the main street. Most locals aren’t even aware that the place exists. It’s kind of a “secret shopping area”, and the merchants seem to like it that way.

Knowing where the Commercial Center is, and actually spending time there, does much more for your “Vegas-cred” than some asinine $20 trick. Trust me.

The Mob Tour actually goes to the area as part of their tour of the underbelly of Vegas (no paid plug, I just took the tour). This is also where the world famous”Green Door” swingers club is located.

There is also a large Asian food market in the Commercial Center that I go to quite frequently.

Word has it that back in the day, this was a really happening area. Frank, Dean, Sammy, and pretty much all of the mob used to hang out in the Commercial Center until the wee hours of the morning. Its proximity to both The Strip and the Las Vegas Country Club made the location ideal for all kinds of debauchery midway between work and home. There were supposedly several unlabeled underground clubs in the area that catered only to those “in the know”.

That’s sort of the case today, only “in the know” now means that you like to do unusual things with your pee-pee … with unusual people.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that at all. As long as you don’t try to touch me with it, I don’t care where you stick the thing.

I still get a boner when they undress the female mannequins in Sears … who am I to judge?

It’s just always struck me as kind of “uniquely Vegas” that I buy my groceries mere yards from where people are beating the hell out of each other with whips while having objects shoved up their ass while dressed like the Queen of Sheba.

You don’t get this stuff at the Walmart Plaza in Wisconsin.

I just took a trip to said grocery store, and brought my camera along for the trip. If you’ve ever wondered “Hey, I wonder where VegasRex goes shopping?”, then by all means, won’t you take a tour of my local strip mall with me.

If you’ve ever wanted to be beaten senseless while having crossdressing gay sex, now you know where to go.

You’re welcome.