A Vegas bar owner was sued Monday for failing to comply with the new “Nevada Clean Indoor Air Act” a/k/a “The Smoking Ban”.

Stephen Mignali, owner of Bilbo’s Bar and and Grill was apparently waiting for the chance to challenge the laws.

That’s why he put ashtrays out.

“The ash trays were left out so we could get a court test,” Peccole told The Associated Press. “I’m born and raised here. I don’t like that someone can come in and tell you how to operate your business - who can smoke, and who can’t smoke.”

Now, I don’t give a damn about the smoking ban one way or the other … but I don’t think ole’ Steve is going to win this one.

I’ll tell you why, and it’s really simple.

Because you can’t drink beer in Walmart.

See, I told you it was simple.

Apparently Steve is not aware that “someone” has been telling Nevadans how to “run their business” since … well …. forever.

Have you ever been to Walmart? Don’t you think being completely wasted would make the experience more tolerable?

Well, who’s to tell Walmart who can and can’t drink in their establishment? (or smoke pot in the privacy of their own home … but that’s another post)

The government can. Just as they can tell them how much sales tax to collect, how many handicapped parking spaces they have to have, how many handicapped bathroom stalls they have to have, and that they cannot discriminate in the store on the basis of race or religion.

No business in this country has ever, and I mean EVER, been able to operate in this country without “someone coming in and telling them how to operate their business”.

So, you see, Steve can’t win.

Because if Steve does win, that means that I can drink a gallon of vodka in Walmart, and he can tell “those somones coming in” that he doesn’t want to paint no stinking handicapped parking spaces out front.

And what kind of precident would that set?

One that won’t happen.

But if by some fluke chance he does win … I’m sooo downing a fifth of Jack Daniels while chasing the Walmart greeter around with my pants around my knees.

You can read the full news story here:

http://tinyurl.com/yt8bed

After having a horrible run of cold cards, and paying dearly for getting up early to qualify for the Monthly Hilton Tournament, I decided to relax by taking an early morning ride on my scooter up and down The Strip.

While sitting at the stoplight at Karen and Paradise, I saw something interesting.

Remember the old “Wet N’ Wild” water park next to the Sahara? Ever wonder what happened to it?

Yeah, me neither.

But I found out anyway.

It is now a “Picnic Plaza”. And not just any “Picnic Plaza”, but one with about 50 tractor-trailers parked in it. Sweet.

For those of you desperately looking for that “Detroit Industrial Picnic Experience”, well hell, look no further.

I told you that we had something for everyone here.

And wait … it gets better. For those of you that hate dining under Semi’s in small numbers, and for those of you who have had to tell disappointed friends and family “No, you cannot dine at the Wet N’ Wild Picnic Plaza with us, there is simply not enough room!” …. it is now available for “Group Outings”!!!

Yes, GROUP OUTINGS!

Seriously, can life get any better than that?

I think not.

Why come to Vegas and eat at the Bellagio Buffet when you can pack a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in a brown bag, and eat it while sitting under an 18 wheeler while sniffing diesel exhaust?

Now that, my friends, is fine dining.

Remember, the number is 765-9700. Tell them VegasRex sent you, and will get a tube of wheel grease absolutely free.

It goes great with potato chips.

No need to wait for 2010 …. the North Strip has already arrived, folks.

Grab those picnic baskets and head on over.

Pamela Anderson will replace Carmen Electra as special guest star in Hans Klok’s new show, “The Beauty of Magic,” at the Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino in Las Vegas, it was announced Thursday.

Electra, 35, said at a press conference last week she would be with the show for three months. Publicists had called it her stage debut in Las Vegas and promised “sultry surprises.”

But Electra pulled out before the magic show’s opening for “scheduling reasons,” said Bill Taylor, the chief executive of Stage Entertainment, which produces Klok’s show. “We couldn’t work dates out.”

In announcing her special guest appearance, Anderson, 39, popped out of an apparently empty box at the crowded Extra lounge at the former Aladdin casino-hotel on the Las Vegas Strip.

“My kids are going to love this,” she said. “This is my dream of being a Vegas showgirl come true.”

The grand opening of the show is June 2.

On a related note, VegasRex popped out of an apparently empty bathroom stall at the Downtown bus station, and was quoted as saying “This is my dream of spanking my monkey in the front row of a magic show come true.”

Here, boys and girls, is how we turn a $38 ticket into a $55 ticket.

Ass-jockeys.

I’m not going to cut off my nose to spite my face by not seeing Cornell in a small venue, but I wouldn’t piss on the CEO of Ticketassturds if he was on fire.

And why the hell doesn’t the Mandalay Box Office open before noon?

Come on HOB. Put down the blunt, wake your ass up, and join the rest of modern society alfuckingready!

Oh, and BTW, thanks for printing ads all over my ticket and using up my own ink which you so graciously charged me $2.50 to use.

The “fee sodomy” just wasn’t enough?

Gonad-sniffers.

The voice of Temple of the Dog, Soundgarden, and Audioslave at the Mandalay House of Blues for 35 bucks?

Are you freakin kidding me?

Fuck Aerosmith and the $203.45 for shitty seats, I am going against my usual habit of buying last minute, and getting tickets to this as soon as the box office opens today.

Cornell in a 1,800 person venue?

Holy Shit!

May 4th (next Friday) at the Mandalay House of Blues.

Just … Holy Shit!!

This was the setlist from the Boston Show on April 20th:

Setlist:

Spoonman
Outshined
Hungerstrike
No Such Thing
Like A Stone
Original Fire
Burden in my Hand
Pretty Noose
Seasons
Can’t Change Me
Redemption Song
Doesn’t Remind Me
Cochise
Safe and Sound
You Know My Name
Rusty Cage
1st encore:

Say Hello 2 Heaven
Ghost
Black Hole Sun
2nd Encore:

Slaves and Bulldozers

Just …. holy fucking shit.

In the last 10 years, I can’t remember a show that I have looked forward to more.