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August 8, 2010 at 7:17 pm

10 Worst Things About Living in Las Vegas

Well, you knew it was coming, and I must admit that this one was much easier to write.  It was so easy to write that I had to force myself to cut it short, somewhere over 5,000 words, and break it into separate articles.

Now, in fairness, I’m not trying to bash Las Vegas for sport.  I tried to love it.  Really, I did.

Think about it, I loved the town so much that I picked up and moved here at great expense.  I lived here for 4 years and tried everything I could (including moving 3 times within the city) to make it work.  Most of you out there who claim to love Las Vegas, and think that I am crucifying it for no reason probably cannot say the same.

I didn’t sit around talking about moving to Vegas.  I got off my ass and did it.  I came, I saw, I lived it, I immersed myself, and I experienced it all first-hand.

There is a portion of the population out there who simply prefer that the myth of Las Vegas stay intact.  There is another group that makes money by living in and/or promoting Las Vegas for their own financial gain.

Both of these groups hate what I do, and will probably be offended by this list.  That’s not my problem.  If you are solidly in the “I Heart Las Vegas” camp, then this is not Sunday reading in which you will want to partake.  Consider this fair warning.

For everyone else — take this list for what it is.

My honest, unabashed opinion.

Continue reading “10 Worst Things About Living in Las Vegas” »

July 20, 2010 at 10:15 am

Approaching Las Vegas

Approaching Las Vegas

Taken last night.

July 19, 2010 at 9:35 am

Picture of the Day

Daddy was a cop, on the east side of Chicago

July 11, 2010 at 7:26 am

Picture of the Day


June 23, 2010 at 6:39 am

Picture of the Night


May 14, 2009 at 4:59 pm

The Bikini Stampede

R & R Partners (the Public Relations firm that receives copious amounts of my tax dollars from the LVCVA) organized an odd promotional stunt today.

They succeeded in breaking a world record for largest bikini parade. The goal for the event was 300 girls. We did not meet the female numerical goal, enlisting only 281 women, but we did set the World Record.

The reason I say “we”, is because I paid for it. As did two million of my neighbors.

The Las Vegas Strip Bikini Parade

The Las Vegas Strip Bikini Parade

Continue reading “The Bikini Stampede” »

Pages: 1 2 3

September 13, 2008 at 3:49 pm

VegasRex: The Forrest Gump of Sports Bettors

Las Vegas Hilton Sportsbook

Is it possible to bet on two different teams to win the exact same game, place the bets within 15 minutes of each other, and cash in on both tickets?

Can you really win two sides of the exact same bet?

You can if you are VegasRex.

What can I say, I am just that damn good.

And you’re not.

Continue reading “VegasRex: The Forrest Gump of Sports Bettors” »

July 10, 2008 at 7:26 am

The Las Vegas Review Journal Finally Sinks to My Level!

Las Vegas Review Journal Porn

We knew it would eventually happen.

As large mainstream media outlets continue to hemorrhage cash because they are corrupt, biased, and antiquated ass-kissers of sponsors … some of them are apparently going to extreme measures to re-capture the reader’s attention.

Namely … pornography!

This morning, The Las Vegas Review Journal featured a full frontally nude geriatric lady on the main page of the “Las Vegas News” section. And people call ME offensive.

Say what you want about the quality of this site, but I will never, and I mean never ever ever ever ever put a picture of a nude 70 year old woman on these pages. Unless The Review Journal does it first, of course.  Then I really have no choice.

I have now, officially, become the lone, last bastion of good taste in this town!

And they said it would never happen.

Shame on the Review Journal, the new purveyors of Las Vegas porn.

Thanks to ‘Dcubed’ for having the presence of mind to capture this screen shot when he was greeted by the horrifically offensive material (courtesy of the RJ) this morning.

October 1, 2007 at 8:42 am

In Defense of Circus Circus

Circus Circus Sign Las Vegas

What is the greatest thing about living in Las Vegas?

The whores? The great food? The weather? The 24 hour gambling? The shows?

No, none of those things.

Circus Circus Adventuredome

Continue reading “In Defense of Circus Circus” »

July 16, 2007 at 9:11 am

And Stay Out!

New Frontier Las Vegas

The damn
thing finally closed yesterday.

When they implode it, I am going to be there with a video camera to make my own amateur porn movie.

Nothing can be more arousing than seeing this thing get leveled.

February 3, 2007 at 6:30 pm

More Skeletal Stardust

Las Vegas Stardust Before Implosion

Las Vegas Stardust Before Implosion

I took the Monorail from the Hilton to the MGM today, and from the train I took some shots of the Stardust in the distance.

It’s simply a shell now.

As far as I know, implosion is still planned for the middle of March.

We’ll be there with a video camera when it happens.

December 6, 2006 at 4:29 pm

Yeeeeeeeeeee Haaaaaaawwwwwwwww!!!!!

Las Vegas Hilton Shoe Shine Girls

Las Vegas Hilton Shoe Shine Girls

Las Vegas Hilton Shoe Shine Girls

Las Vegas Hilton Shoe Shine Girls

Las Vegas Hilton Shoe Shine Girls

Las Vegas Hilton Shoe Shine Girls

The Wrangler 2006 National Finals Rodeo is in Las Vegas from November 30th – Dec 9th at the Thomas & Mack Center.

If you have been here in the last week, there’s no doubt that you have seen an unusual amount of people in boots, cowboy hats, and all kinds of Texas-type attire. There are also billboards all over town with a “cowboy” motif. The whole town has gone shit-kicking nutty.

During this event, I am staying as far away from Toby Keith’s Bar and Grill as possible. I really don’t want a boot in my ass, and according to Toby … it’s the American way.

I ran across these two “boot shine girls” at the entrance to the Las Vegas Hilton last Sunday, and I saw them again today.

One was kind enough to strike a pose for me.

They will be there through this weekend, so if your boots are in need of a shinin’, you’d be crazier than a duck on a junebug if you didn’t get it done here.

Wait, is that ANOTHER speck of dust on my shoes???

Dammit, that makes the 6th day in a row. I guess it’s time for yet another frigging polish.

I have no choice, I can’t very well walk around with dirty shoes, now can I …

December 4, 2006 at 6:33 am

Yes, You Can Stay in Toni Braxton’s Vagina

Toni Braxton Mural

Toni Braxton's Vagina Room

We went to see the Caesar’s Palace Christmas tree this weekend, which is directly across from the Flamingo, and provides an unparalleled view of the Flamingo’s Toni Braxton facade.

I looked closer and realized that, yes, the new mural really is painted over guest rooms — and some of the rooms are looking out of some interesting parts of Toni’s body.

Imagine checking into your room, going over to the window, and realizing that you are viewing the fabulous Las Vegas Strip from Toni’s Braxton’s twat. As if this were not inviting enough, you can also stay in Toni’s partially revealed right tit.

Remember, when you call to make reservations at the Flamingo, be sure to ask for the “Toni Braxton Vagina Suite”. Accept no substitutes.